Lastnight I finally watched the movie Everybody's Fine. It made me cry because it reminded me that Nicholas and Noah are going to grow up one day soon and begin and love a life of their own. When it's all said and done . . .it began with me and Jay and in the end it will be just me and Jay.
I try really hard not to take for granted these days . . . these days that the kids are still filled with such need for me. It does get overwhelming and sometimes I feel like I'll just go crazy, but their need for me will diminish as the years pass and amid the craziness and chaos . . . it feels as though my purpose (right now) derives from their need for me. Their need for me to love them, nurture them, feed them, teach them, guide them, and then finally, let them go. It sounds so sad and I know that this is the circle of life - but these two boys - Nicholas and Noah, they are my life, they are my heart, and they are my soul and I want to hold on to these days forever - I don't want to let them go. Becasue they are so precious and I will never get these days back.
Off to church . . . with my beautiful family! Happy Sunday everyone!